#NoseJobGate - The Groggers and Plastic Surgery Disasters

Ah, nose jobs. I remember being a teen and having my grandfather promise me that if I ever wanted a nose job he'd pay for it. Huh? I remember thinking. Why on earth would I want that? Now my brother...he's got serious beak.... It's not just my grandfather, though. Our collective self-consciousnesses about our over-sized honkers comes up regularly in both self-deprecating jokes and in trips to the plastic surgeon. Occasionally, it even bubbles over into the mainstream culture. Maybe it's a way to identify (and identify with) the outsider in last spring's episode of Glee, for example, or to make unexpected (and awkward) connections between actress Halle Berry, her Jewish cousin, and the viewing audience of the Tonight show back in 2007.

Mostly the whole idea is about as cliche and tacky as JAP (Jewish American Princess) or circumcision jokes. (Didja hear the one about the.....)

This week's entry into the Nose Job hall of fame is "Jewcan Sam (A Nosejob Love Song)" by The Groggers. The song, which has now been viewed over 120,000 times, is a funny guy-wants-girl power-pop joke-fest. Get your nose circumcised. Pinocchio never got Snow White. Funny stuff from a band known for sharp humor. (See my previous post on The Groggers)

Here's the song.

"Jewcan Sam" (A Nose Job Love Song) - The Groggers [Official Music Video]



And then it hit the press. I saw it first on the ABC News website under the banner "Miami Plastic Surgeon Under Investigation After Commissioning 'Jewcan Sam' Music Video." For real? How did ABC even hear the song. The Groggers are a relatively unknown (though talented) Orthodox Jewish rock band. But then it came clear...the nose job song and video were paid for by an Orthodox Jewish plastic surgeon in Florida. And hence the scandal. This is, the news narrative states, payola for promotion of plastic surgery to teens. And then the scandal deepened. The leader of the Groggers actually got a nose job himself as part of the deal. This has all the makings for a media feeding frenzy.

The Miami Herald, NBC, the Sun-Sentinal, UPI, and the Huffington Post all weighed in. So did the UK's Daily Mail and Jewish outlets The JTA, The Forward, and Shalom Live. Even the industry site OutpatientSurgery.Com commented. (And to get really meta, I'm writing this post about it citing all those other rags).

And then Groggers band leader Doug Staiman did a great radio interview capitalizing on the whole affair on 107.2 FM.

The verdict so far? The plastic surgeon involved may have violated ethics rules in funding the video. The band may have violated good taste and judgement by taking the funding. The song is pretty darn good and pretty darn ambiguous as to its stance on Jewish nose jobs. Which is all just fine with me. The Groggers are notorious for writing funny songs that tweak the Jewish community. Have at it boys.

The Groggers. Holding a fun-house mirror to Orthodox Jewish life.

To paraphrase one of my favorite rock critics, (Paul Williams "Rock and Roll The 100 Best Singles"), there are two primal rock and roll traditions.... angry stupidity and cheerful stupidity. But there's a counter tradition too, smart stupidity. The court jester. The smart guy (or gal) playing dumb. Sometimes with snarky bite, like Jello Biafra and the Dead Kennedys. Sometimes with nerdy-bafflement, like They Might be Giants. But always that sense that you'd better press rewind and listen to that one again. They just said something that needs to be heard.

The first time I heard The Groggers, I didn't press rewind. The song was Get, and the band bumbled along with a power-pop finger shake at a guy who didn't deserve his girl. A well-played Orthodox novelty song, but (to my ears at the time) nothing more. I wasn't hooked yet. But tonight they sent me their new video "Upper West Side" and they got me. Court Jester. Smart Stupidity. Press Rewind.

Check it out

"Upper West Side Story" - The Groggers



Under the wide eyed naivete of singer/songwriter L.E. Staiman's vocals, is some sharp satirical bite. The phrase "I want to live on the Upper West Side where the girls always stay 29, accountants by day, speed daters by night" was delivered deadpan, but dead on the mark. (As are the hysterical West Side Story "be cool" finger snaps in the video.)

Ok, now go listen to the even better Groggers ballad "Eishes Chayil." I winced when I saw the title. Eishes Chayil, the Woman of Valor, is a regular motif in Orthodox pop music. Derived from a (sometimes touching, often awkward) Shabbat ritual, the Eishes Chayil pop song is usually over-earnest and condescending in it's celebration of the vague awesomeness of the Jewish woman. (Here's Orthodox crooner Yaakov Shwerky singing a representative example.) The Groggers skewer it beautifully. Staiman's version pushes the vague detachment of the Eishes Chayil concept as far as it will go... straight into a Weird Al Yankovic-style voyeuristic creep-fest. "If you ever need me... I'll be right out your window."

In a post on Frum Satire that went up this morning, Heshy Fried lauded them for being a Jewish band that didn't spend their time singing about religious topics, but instead sang about (Orthodox) Jewish life. That's true, and Fried's right that the Orthodox community needs more bands like that. But I think that misses the point a bit. The Groggers aren't singing about frum life, they're holding up a fun-house mirror to it.

Under their dumb lyrics are a smart insiders critique of Orthodox life. And that's brave thing to do. Smart stupidity. Court Jester. Rock and roll.

Update: I forgot to mention that The Groggers debut album "There is no I in Cherem" dropped in August. Go get it.